Daygame is one of the most well-known words in the PUA industry. It means approaching a girl you don’t know during the day-time. This can also happen during night time. Basically, the difference between daygame and nightgame (bars, clubs, etc.) is anywhere you approach a girl where she isn’t sitting in a bar or club.
That approach counts as daygame.
So why do I think it is so effective?
Well, that’s what the whole article is about.
I’m going to talk about why even though most of the daygame approaches you do, you will get rejected. And why that doesn’t matter.
I will also talk about how you can very quickly get rid of approach anxiety. That way, you won’t have to dedicated 2-3 hours everyday to just daygame because that is one of the most inefficient ways of doing pickup. Instead, you could be running your usual errands, things that you were going to do anyway. And then if you come across a cute girl that you like, you could quickly approach her and see if she would be interested in you.
I do have to give credit where credit is due, this method of getting rid of approach anxiety, I learned it from john Anthony lifestyles and Derek from more plates more dates.
So, without any further ado, lets just jump right into it.
You Think Willpower Is All You Need
There is nothing wrong in believing that all you need is willpower to start approaching 10-20 girls everyday and you will have the dating life of your dreams.
But here’s the thing – every day you wake up, you have a limited amount of willpower. And with each decision you make throughout the day, you willpower gets used up.
So imagine you using your willpower to do each and each cold approach. Imagine how much willpower you will use up. At the end of your daygame session, you won’t even have any energy left to do other things in your life that you absolutely have to do.
So, instead of you using your willpower to do every approach, you should instead create a habit out of it. That way, whenever you see a cute girl, you don’t even have to think about it. Before you know it, you are already moving toward her and introducing yourself to her.
That way, your brain won’t even have a chance to use your willpower to justify this approach to yourself and picturing all the good things that could come out of this relationship. You would just take massive action without much effort and create all of those things for yourself.
Your Brain Is Irrational
This is one of the most common things I’ve heard guys talk about – I’ve done daygame approaches and 9 out of 10 times I’ve gotten rejected.
Tinder is much more efficient at getting dates because you are not wasting time getting ready, travelling to the location and then approaching girls.
Sure, that is a great argument. And you definitely should integrate dating apps like tinder, bumble, okcupid, etc in your sourcing methods. Because you want to have access to as many cute and hot girls as possible. Because like john Anthony likes to say – it will exponentially increase your chances of getting that one girlfriend that you have always been looking for. Or maybe multiple girlfriends if you are into that kind of stuff.
Either way, the main thing is, the rejections don’t matter.
So why does it feel so dreadful to approach a beautiful girl in the street?
Well, the answer is simple. So simple that we made it more complicated for ourselves – it is our primal brain.
The fear that you feel throughout your body when you approach a girl, it is justified. And it is there because back in the day when we used to live in small tribes, all beautiful women were taken by the local alpha males. And anyone that tried to poach those females from him would either get killed or would have to battle the alpha male for them.
And the winner of this battle would get all the women that the other guy had.
So back in the day, if your approach wasn’t good enough, you could literally get killed for it.
Luckily, we are living in safer times now. We live in cities where we have laws and police protecting us.
But our brain hasn’t evolved much in the last 100,000 years. So it still thinks that if you approach that beautiful random girl in the street, you would have to go to fight with the alpha guy that she is currently with and win that battle to win her over.
That never happens though does it.
Have you ever matched with a girl on tinder and had to literally get in the ring and fight another dude for her? Never. That’s the same with daygame. But the only difference is, you are going to get to approach girls that are much more beautiful and are pleasing for you in real life.
Tinder isn’t a good representation of a person because it is easy to make anyone look good in pictures. That is why they say, pictures can be, or in most cases, are deceiving. You only see the true person when you meet them in real life.
How Do You Get Rid of Approach Anxiety?
It is very simple.
I’m assuming that you are a guy who is dedicated to improving himself. You spend every day improving your body, your skills and your mind. And that means you are going to the gym on a regular basis.
Here’s how John Mulvehill from John Anthony Lifestyle puts it – this girl that you are afraid of approaching is a 110 pound female with very low upper body strength.
So, even if she could put all her energy into punching you really hard, it wouldn’t hurt you that much. She is just a cute 110 pound female that you would like to get to know. The anxiety you are feeling right now is either your primal brain like I mentioned above, or it is your perception that if people were to overhear your conversation they would judge you for it.
Well, here’s the reality my friend – all the people that you see on the street right now, you will never see the again. So even if they hear your conversation, the fact that you will never see them again, makes their judgement invalid because it doesn’t affect your life at all.
But here’s the opposite side of the coin – if you really hit it off with the girl you just approached, it could end up being one of the best relationships you’ve ever been in.
Who knows, you might even end up marrying this person.
So you have to ask yourself this question – do you think it is a big deal that some random people you will never see again will hear what you are talking about with this girl in the street?
Or do you think it doesn’t matter what they think because you are shooting your shot. And if you land it, it could literally change your life for the better?
I hope the answer to that question is that it doesn’t matter what they think and that you should go for what you want. Because that is the best way to live your life. You shouldn’t force yourself to underachieve in anything in your life just because what other people might think about you.